If Ya Can't Take the Heat...

When you have an opinion and a willingness to express it, you're bound to have people who criticize you and/or your opinions. I've been the recipient of both kinds of critical comments, and it's fun to watch what people take from what I write.

I split my critics into two categories. The first group is comprised of people who take the time to read and offer insight related to what I wrote. They don't agree with me and they tell me why without getting nasty or straying off the subject to go on a rant. I take these people seriously because they thought through my position and took the time to construct an argument. And I thank them because they keep me intellectually honest and often give me insight and information I can add to my knowledge base. I thank God for people like that in my life.

Then, there is the group I call the "Howling Jackals." These people do anything and everything in their power to misrepresent, go personal, and malign a person when they don't agree with him or her. To them, dissent is proof of their intellectual and moral superiority because they've invested so much of their egos into being right. I've been accused of that more than a few times myself, but I'm not afraid to admit when I'm wrong and I'm one of the first people to make a joke at my own expense. The Howling Jackals can't. To even admit they're wrong is to put a dent in their inflated self-image, which to them undermines their entire existence.

Needless to say, I don't take the slings and arrows out the Howling Jackals too seriously. In fact, I take great amusement at their comments because it's fun to watch how far they're willing to go to make themselves feel better, even to the point of misrepresenting what I write so they have a reason to complain. I could write a long dissertation on why I like cats and the Howling Jackals would say, "You hate dogs, you jerk!"

I learned a long time ago how to separate the two types of critics and appreciate them accordingly. And I urge other writers to do the same. If you let the Howling Jackals in your life have too much influence, it negatively impacts your ability to express yourself since you try to please them at the expense of your passions. But it will never be enough. If they dislike you, they'll always dislike you, even if you wind up kissing their butts. So, why try to change the minds of those who have already made up their minds? It's an exercise in futility.

Instead, focus on honing your craft and try to please your biggest critic: yourself.